At this rate. My blood pressure will kill me. Am I afraid of not waking up one day?
I remember when I was stuck under the raft being pulled down into the whirlpool and I realized that I may actually die from drowning. Then a strange feeling overcame me and calmed me down. I took one last breath and said to myself, "I am ready to die, God." I was willing to accept the fact that I would die in that whirlpool in Africa. Everything felt as if it the weight of the world was lifted from my shoulders and there was nothing but peace. I went under with the whirlpool as it sucked me down into the darkness and I could only see myself being tossed and turned in the rapids. Then it was silence and everything seemed still as if nothing was moving. I felt like I was floating in space and I could see the depth of darkness as I was rotating and then I saw the light at the surface. I heard a voice inside of me say that if I wanted to survive that I would need to swim to the surface. Then the rest is history as I am now typing this blog here tonight.
Was I scared when I was stuck under the raft? I was for a moment, but everything was surreal once I realized I was powerless and could only put my hopes in a higher power if one or any existed. From time to time I get these thoughts in my head that maybe it was meant to be for me to die that day or even the episode I had when I ended up in ER Surgery. That maybe the life of Frankie was shorten because he was doing what believed in which was to protect the kingdom and that kingdom is the family.
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